Feast

– It just goes to show: you think you're feeling fine after a minor stomach bug, and yet I ended up at death's door for a whole week.
 – At death's door? That sounds rather serious. You should have mentioned it.
– Well, I was feeling pretty poorly, at least: spending large parts of the day in bed, with no interest in food; neither of which is normal for me.
– But at least it's over now. Hopefully. Which is luckily just in the nick of time.
– For?
– For the traditional feasting of Shrove Tuesday.
– I'm not sure I'm really in the mood for feasting tonight. Maybe tomorrow.
– You miss the point. You feast today in order to forsake all food tomorrow, and indeed for the next few months. Till Christmas, I think.
– That seems an awful long time. Especially having not eaten much all week.
– It will make you a better person: spiritually, as well as physically. So in order to avoid temptation, you should empty the house of unnecessary food. Hence the invention of the pancake, which clearly makes use of the entire contents of your fridge. And larder. At least it did in mediaeval times, when people tended to keep less in the fridge. Eggs, basically, and not much else.
– Life must have been simpler then.
– Yes. I suppose it must have been a little dull. Unless you were particularly fond of eggs.