Twenty-second

– I seem to have spent the day stocking up the fridge.
– I thought the fridge was fairly full to begin with.
– Yes, but not with anything particularly useful. Mainly half-empty jars of stuff well past their sell-by dates. Long-forgotten vegetables slowly turning to compost. Leftovers neatly bagged and labelled and crammed into the bottom of the freezer, never to be seen again. It's quite therapeutic to have a clear-out and make space for the turkey.
– I wondered what that was. There also seem to be bags of food scattered around the house.
– Well, not all the non-fridge items will fit in the cupboards. So I've had to be creative in my storage solutions.
– Will you be able to remember where you've left everything?
– Try me.
– Mayonnaise.
– ... We could make it from scratch.
– Have you ever made it from scratch?
– It can't be that difficult. What do you need?
– Eggs.
– ... Probably in the conservatory.